7 March 2015

Selamat Tinggal.

perjalanan itu akan berakhir.

di mana,
bila
dan
bagaimana

soalan itu tidak berjawapan.

hanya ada pada diri adalah untuk bersedia.

saat menghadapi kehilangan itu.
dunia seolah terhenti.

TITIK.

The reality hits me really slow, I only feel it after I heard my dad cracking voice while being the Imam for my Atuk Solat Sunat Jenazah. This actually the second time I heard this sad voice of my abah. First when my late tok wan passed away.

we arrived at 6.30 he sit by the bed and start reciting the quranic verse. at the last verse his voice start cracking.

This time around I'm the one who was driving because my Abah was already in kampung.  So I am taking my mama n adik-adik to pay our last respect for my Atuk.

driving for 5 hours, non-stop.
my head totally blank.
I don't cry
not until i heard my Abah voice.
I don't know how much my mum longing to be with my dad at that time.
We don't really talk about how we feel each other because it was awkward.

One thing I realize about my family, We don't really talk about feeling.
We kind of just understand each other by looking in each other eyes.
But usually we tend to ignore.



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