7th Anniversary

Alhamdulillah.
Happy Anniversary to my beloved blog.
You know that you are my special space.
Space where I keep to myself and space where I share with people.
dear blog, only know how many post that I keep as draft and only we can read it.
only you know my deepest secret, my ugly side of myself. my afford to be better.


Happy 7th Anniversary.


you keep me company through my high and down.
tq. and I would like to dedicate this song for you.





A white ice flower that bloomed
Puts its face out in the welcoming wind
It sheds tears over the wordless and nameless past
Hiding in the cold wind
Melting down under the single ray of sunlight
That’s how you came to me once more
Only good memories, only a longing heart
On the path where you left me
I’m standing alone
Only until I can forget you, until I will be alright
I’ll swallow my tears and at the end of my wait
I will bloom once again
Love is a fiery flower that blooms and withers
In case I get wet with the rain, I close my eyes
In my youth and small heart
The dazzling memories shine
I call out to you once again
Only good memories, only a longing heart
On the path where you left me
I’m standing alone
Only until I can forget you, until I will be alright
I’ll swallow my tears and at the end of my wait
Then once again, I will
On top of the dry land
My entire body is burning
Your scent that remained on my fingers is scattering away
Your hand that is growing far apart
I can’t hold onto it so it hurts
Just until I can survive, just as much as I hated you
When the spring comes to bring you back later on
Then I will bloom on that day
p/s:
In my personal life, there are moment that make me think that I don't want to move forward and I don't even to be anywhere at the moment. Just exclude myself from the world seem like the best option that I have. but I know that the storm that come in my life just the matter to wash away my sin and to help me to grow stronger and be better. In the end there is only good memories and a longing heart that left with me. even though I'm standing here alone,I know I will be alright and I will swallow my tears and pains and once again I will be just fine. 
sometimes, we want to depend on people just too much and we don't trust our ability to heal and be strong on our own. being alone doesn't mean you are weak and fragile but you are strong enough to stand on your own. tq Allah for always be there for me and I know that I never am a good servant to You, but oh Allah you never let go of my hand. I'm alone but forever under your protection. 
that tear that he shed at the end of that song is something that is very meaningful and that is something I still not be able to it on my own. tear of overcoming my own weakness.
I'm sorry for my child-like mind and writing. 

enjoy the song and of course the meaningful lyric


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