Finding Solace in Solitude

بِسْمِ اللهِ الرَّحْمٰنِ الرَّحِيْمِ   

In the name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful 

 . . .

"Language...has created the word 'loneliness' to express the pain of being alone. And it has created the word 'solitude' to express the glory of being alone."

Paul Tillich

It seems like the world is going through a moment of uncertainty due to the covic-19 pandemic. The world seems to be put on hold. Students can't go to school, millions of people are unable to work and almost everything outside has been shut down. And now life just circles around ourselves, in our own home and the fear of the virus. 

We find solace in solitude.

For years, we live our lives in the busyness of the world. We work, social gatherings, going out to shop, meeting friends and family. And suddenly everything has to stop. We can’t go out, social distancing and the fear.

No one even expects this to happen. No one prepares for this moment. But suddenly it is happening and we have to learn to adapt as quickly as possible.

It may seem hard to digest but it’s happening now and we have to change now.

Some of us think that this is bad and it’s hard to handle.

But InsyaAllah we can go through this together.

If we think carefully, we will understand that this is a golden opportunity from our Lord.

To be in solitude.

On our own.

By ourselves.

Just you and Him.

For me personally, this is the 2^nd time I need to “stay home”. From September 2018 until February 2019, due to my “tulang besi” was my first time. Through that experience, I learn a lot and I would say that is one of the best moments of self-discovery I ever had in my life. And things happened not by choice but by chance.

Why I think about solace when I think about solitude?

Because I think at this moment we learn that whatever happens to us now is what Allah wants. There is a hadith that mention that whatever happens in our life as a ‘Muslim” is what’s best for us. If it’s good we need to be grateful and if it’s hard we must be patient.

There is one hadith that mention about two profitable things in life that people tend to ignore and never take advantage of it.  The first one is free time and the second one is health. And it is rare that we can have these two simultaneously. Because usually when we are healthy, we are busy with our worldly life. And when we are sick, Allah gives us a lot of free time but there’s not much we can do when we are sick.

During this RMO, Allah actually give most of us both thing; health and free time. I learn about this value in a hard way. After I broke my leg, I can barely move because it’s hard. So for months, I spent my life on bed. I had all the time for myself but I have so little that I can do. Before the incident, my life was hectic; my planner was pack and suddenly nothing. It took me quite a while to digest the whole thing.

 Alhamdulillah, after spending some time alone, I did a lot of thinking. I tried to find the hikmah behind the trial that Allah tested me with. One of the greatest life lessons I got from that experience was the value of gratitude. I never see life the same way again after that. No matter how bad things are, I will always find something that I’m grateful for. Appreciating life and all it gift even to the smallest of things and always be grateful for things that I took for granted before.

Who would have thought that to be able to go out of our house is a blessing? Meeting friends outside is a blessing. Even going out to shop is a blessing. Before, do we really say “Alhamdulillah Ya Allah because I can drive to work.” “ Alhamdulillah I can go to Pasar.” “Alhamdulillah I can go to school.” Rarely right! When do we realize that it is a blessing? When the freedom is gone, when that menial right is taken away from us, then only we realize what we blessed life we have and yet we rarely grateful.

And now Allah blesses and trial us with this RMO, don’t wait until this opportunity is gone then we regret. Surely Allah wants us to learn something through this trial.

SOLACE AND SOLITUDE.

During this time, we should not be overthinking. Yes everyone is worry about the uncertainty of this situation. How bad can it goes, when we can continue with our life again and will we be okay at the end of this trial?

No one can answer that question. Only Allah knows. Be patient and let Him take care of us. And in the meantime, we should do something with our inner self since we can’t go out. This time in solitude is a great gift from Allah. It has the capacity to reset, rejuvenate, restore, and remarkably heal.

First, we can RESET. After all these years, we always come out with a lot of self-resolution to better at sometimes or to start doing something. But after all this while, we always let our resolution goes untouched because we always use our busy life as an excuse. Now this opportunity comes, it’s between you and yourself. For one month, we have total control of our time management. We can reset our life intention. We can reset our bad habits. We can reset our sinful deeds by asking our Lord for His forgiveness.

Second, we can rejuvenate our life, our inner soul, our way of thinking. For some of us, in our life, we never really have a moment to stop and to have time for ourselves. Everything revolves around others. Family, friends and our superior are our priority and fulfilling their need and request and put ours none on the list. In this time of solitude, we need to put ourselves onto the list of priority too. Do something that we love, will be able to help us to rejuvenate. When we have less social engaging, we will listen more to our inner thought. Make zikr, because Allah said in the Quran;

“Verily, in the remembrance of Allah do hearts find rest”

13:28

Third, in this solitude we will be able to restore again with what we have been missing after all this time. This is the moment, we can restore our positivity after too much negativity in our life. We can re-learn what we already forget due to our busyness. At this time, we also have the opportunity to restore our relationship with our Maker. After so many late and missing prayers during our busy period, we can restore it back by start praying on time, replacing all our missing prayers and top it up with our voluntary prayers.

And in this moment of solitude, we can actually Heal. Everyone surely has their own brokenness and even worn-out inside out. Take this time to heal ourselves. Away from anything, no judging people, less dateline and no exact planning ahead because we don’t know for sure when this RMO going to end. We have spent what feels like a lifetime moving so quickly that we have forgotten to stop and pause. Our body, our mind, our soul, our heart and our Iman need to be healed. In order to ensure, that we will come back stronger after this hardship, we have to heal.

Take a deep breath and remind ourselves what remains in the quiet amidst the stillness. What has been in plain sight, that we have dismissed as we race towards an invisible finish line.  In this stillness, life doesn’t stop, it just preparing us to be stronger and to be a better person.

Now is a good time to finish all books that line on the shelf waiting to be read. Now is a good time to start eating healthy because we are in-charge of cooking. Now is a good time to learn home exercise because we are at home all the time. Now is a good time to start to have a good life routine. The time is now.

The most important is even in solitude like this, we still have an abundance of blessings from our Lord. The comfort of our bed, the hot meal from our own kitchen, family, and friends that still try to stay connected despite the social distancing, and even the morning light that spills into our window. Everything is a blessing.

With a grateful heart, we will be able to find solace.

p/s: less time on social media also a good habit to have and maybe you should start journaling.