The Idea of a perfect day.

بِسْمِ اللهِ الرَّحْمٰنِ الرَّحِيْمِ    

In the name of Allah, the most Gracious, the most Merciful  

 . . . 

And we find at the end of a perfect day, The soul of a friend we've made.

Carrie Jacobs-Bond

Something about this life that make me so grateful is to have a good friends that willing to teach me to become a better person and willing to pick me up when I fall.

Something that I learn from this girl is her patience. How she willing to go through things for year. Things that I quit only after 4 months doing it. Her kind heart and her power to pull her self out of misery. Knowing her for 17 years mark how a great friend she is.

The attitude that I need to learn and apply in my life. You go girl. 💪

My new friend that I meet only after years of following her on Instagram. 

Things that I learn from this girl is kindness and her hand writing is so on point.

We have this passion for journaling,  Something that I have been doing for a few years, but to have someone to share this passion definitely a joy to my life. I pray that Allah will ease your journey in seeking knowledge InsyaAllah.

To have a good friend you have to be one first.

This a few advice that I have to remind myself and you:

 First you have to choose your friends wisely. Trust me that people that you have around you will shape your personality too. Friendship is not just about having fun all the time BUT friends are people that can tell you the truth to your face but never talk behind your back. At the same time, remember to treat everyone with respect. Your need to respect your friend and your friend need to respect you.It is very important to treat yourself with respect. 

Second, you don't need to see each other everyday to stay as a friend. Through out the years you will learn that. Allow your friends to make their own friend and you should too. Maybe you meet each others at school and you went to different university. That doesn't mean that you can no longer be friends. You have to make the effort to keep that friendship alive. Take some effort to stay in touch. It's not necessary for you to go out and meet each others all the same. A text and Salam will make do of it. InsyaALLAH.

Third, you will realize that numbers will never win over the quality. Find the quality of a true friend. A good friend suppose to make you a better person. We should be aware how people effect our life, the good or bad. Find balance in your relationship. A good friendship shouldn't drain your energy, instead help you to become a better person. A good friend will help each other to become the best version of oneself. You will learn from each others and will try be the best version of friend for each other.

Fourth, less expectation, more effort. Friendship is about give and take. You need each other but you can't rely on them 100%. Each of us need to live our life in our own way. You don't need to hide your personality just to feel accepted by others. Learn to appreciate your differences. That's when you will get the best out of your friendship. You should remember that, your cannot expect to have more in your friendship if you yourself don't start to put in your effort first. You get what you give. 

Lastly, saying NO is okay even to your own friend. Sometimes, we have this fear of letting them down and the fear of losing it when we can't contribute. Remember that life happens to everyone. Everyone have their own commitment and responsibility outside your friendship. A good friend will try to understand your situation and at some point you will need to be in that position too. 

Islam taught us a few principles of friendship.

1. A good friends will remind you of the remembrance of Allah.

Allah subḥānahu wa ta'āla (glorified and exalted be He) says in the Qur’an:

“And (remember) the Day when the wrong-doer will bite his hands and say: Woe to me! Would that I had taken a path with the Messenger. Woe to me! If only I had not taken so- and-so as a friend! He has led me astray from this Reminder (the Qur’an) after it had come to me. And Satan is ever a deserter to man in the hour of need.” 

       [Qur’an: Chapter 25, Verses 27-29]

                                                                                          

2. Some secret need to be keep to yourself- not everything you need to share with your friend.

3. Listen to people attentively. Pay attention when someone is speaking to you and make sure you gather the full extent of their message. Give sincere advice that will benefit them, but do not rush to do so in an overbearing manner.

 Abu Hurairah said,

“When he (the Prophet ṣallallāhu 'alayhi wa sallam (peace and blessings of Allāh be upon him)) faced someone, he faced him completely. When he turned away, he turned away completely. I have never seen anyone like him and I will never see anyone like them.”

[Al-Adab Al-Mufrad]

The ultimate friendship story I ever heard was the friendship of Rasulullah saw, Abu Bakar R.a and Umar R.a. That is the real #friendshipGOAL.

Remember to make du'a to Allah to give us friends that can help each others to be in Jannah not Jahannam. InsyaALLAH. And remember that, before hoping for others to be that version, we should start the effort to be one first. InsyaAllah.